Responsibility....

3 months ago, a dear friend of mine died.  I haven't written about it because I still haven't been able to fully process it.  That's one of my problems......it takes me a while to feel.  I think when I get a little shock, my system just shuts down rather than allow me to feel pain.  So, it takes me longer to get to the mourning process than most people.  It's annoying.....and it makes me appear cold and unfeeling.  But I'm not.  I just process and get to places a little differently than most people.

I hadn't seen my friend in a few years.  She was instrumental in helping me get my short acting career off the ground.  She was the first person to believe in me and push me to do things I truly believed I wasn't capable of.  That was her talent.....seeing the truth in people they, themselves, couldn't see.  And she could influence and bring out the best in people unlike anyone I've ever seen.  She had no children of her own and gave me her mother's pearls as a wedding gift.......something I will cherish forever.

I was in awe of all the posts on facebook about her.  Time and time again......it was the same.  'She believed in me when I didn't believe in myself'.  'She brought out the best in me.'  'She was the most loving person I ever knew'.  'She never gave up on me'.    And on, and on, and on.......
It was like I had written them all because I related with every statement made.  And I thank God I had her in my life, even if we had not spoken or visited in a while.  I don't know that I'll ever be inspired by another person as strongly as I have been by Emile.  She was one of a kind.

After beginning to process the pain of it all, I was full of the desire not to let good friendships fall by the wayside....no matter how far apart I am from people.  So, Kevin and I made a trip to see a couple who we immediately found a strong connection and friendship with 12 years ago.  We always go several years before seeing each other but no more.  We had a wonderful time and made a pact not to let time pass again.  I promise I intend to keep in a number of my relationships.

I truly believe God puts people in our lives for a reason.  He hand picks them.  He knows what we need, who we need, when we need them.  And it's up to us to nurture those friendships.  They are so easily forgotten and left to die.  And I believe God puts ME in peoples lives, too.  What I do with the responsibility He gives to me concerning these relationships is up to me.

I refuse to waste the relationships He has given me.  Life is short and precious and so are the people in our lives.  I don't ever want to forget that again.


On another note.....I created my first tutorial video for my gallery, Sanctuary of Davidson.  It's my first attempt and pretty simple but I'd love some feedback!
I'll be doing more of these in the future and also hosting online art classes.  This is my little beginning.  Because God also gives us talents.....and what we do with those talents....also....... is our responsibility.

Take a looksy!